blast from the past

i remembered...scribbled on a couple of white cube notes, tucked between yellowed sheets of a favorite book...i found and read it again after all these years. to what caused this sudden reminiscence, i cannot say.

then and now
i catch myself alone in your gaze
not knowing
how or why
your words haunt me still
like a slow flame
blue & brilliantly sad

so cold
like the night
you do not bare yourself to anyone
yet how i feel you inside me
like water
and fire

i do not know what to say

you are so distant
your eyes
lost among old feelings and words -

how can we forget?
my heart cannot understand you still
the years haven't uncovered anything
more than dried roses
and crumpled letters

i wonder if you love me
but the stars hide you
and the evening goes on
remembering.

for how long can you wait
if you start forgetting
that i'm here or there

always leaving before losing twilight
i find myself alone again.

the scariest thing about the past is that it's part of us. no matter where we go, how much of it we forgot, we carry it with us always.

like home-cooked dinner, good or bad, there will always be leftovers.